Friday, October 20, 2006


Yes, it's my birthday today. Well, it still is in the USA. It's officially not my birthday here in Japan, because Japanese culture is so far advanced over American culture, their country exists one day BEFORE you guys. Yeah. Stinky barbarians. FACE!

I took a day off work -- a legit one -- and saw the Lady in the Water movie with the fine, fine woman of posts previous. I admit that I like M. Night Shamalamadingdong's movies. I like situations where seemingly normal, average people are faced with something completely fucked up, but manage to pull through because they have some weird skeletons in their closet. Things aren't always as they seem, he seems to be trying to say.

After that we got some cake.

Ever wonder what it looks like when a newly-turned 30 year old is holding a super-super rich chocolate cake with inappropriately long candles wearing a t-shirt and underwear?

I thought you might.

That might look like a thumbs-up, but it's actually a fighting stance I developed during my time as a cage fighter. First I blind you with my Forehead Reflection of Doom. Right when you think I'm giving you a thumbs up, I strike you in the KOTT-DAMN

Just kidding. But the cake was super rich, and after just a smidge, I felt pretty incapacitated. And yeah, I was wearing boxer briefs.

It was pretty much the perfect birthday. No fanfare. No frills. Maybe this weekend I'll get my drink on, because people are supposed to buy me shots. Maybe I'll show the aforementioned lady how charming I can be when I'm throwing up on myself and peeing my pants.

I feel it also bears mentioning that this is the third birfday that I've blogged on. The first one, of course, was this one from Afghanistan, and the second one was last year, where I went on a stupid birthday rant. If you've somehow forgotten at some point while reading this what a complete retard I am, I recommend checking out those two posts.

Anyway, I thought I'd make a little post giving you all the opportunity to shower me with birthday wishes, and hopefully the odd gift certificate. More later.


Blogger brando said...

Holy smokes Paully San! I know that "guide" buisness was there just for my reading pleasure. I wonder what our drill instructors are up to right now.

Happy Damn Birthday, Ass Face!

Have a Long Island for me, cause thats pretty much the birthday drink. I want pics.

1:06 PM  
Blogger Paul said...

long islands tend to end up with me voguing the local mentally handicapped person, so i might stick to my usual vodka 'n' tonics.....

1:50 PM  
Blogger Hammer said...

Welcome to the thirties, good sir. They're even more fun than your twenties, if you ask me. Plus the pay's better and the insurance is cheaper.

12:10 AM  
Anonymous Uncle Mike said...

Happy freakin Birthday Paul!!! Holy shit........if your thirty I must be...nevermind. For me, life has been somthing like this so far. At twenty, I figured I knew just about everything, and that gettin over was simple, because most of humankind were simpletons.At thirty I realized I knew almost nothing, so I just "acted as if". When I turned 40,things started to flow and clarify. Now, in my fifties I am really kickin ass!

9:05 AM  
Blogger Jinxy said...

Happy Birthday.

Red Belly!!!!

11:33 PM  
Blogger Ghost Dog said...

Happy belated B-day, man. Welcome to thirtywhatever.

2:36 AM  
Anonymous Tony said...

Happy Birthday Paul. Sorry I haven't checked your blog in awhile so my birthday wishes are so late but I guess if that's a problem then fuck you you asshole, you want to fuckin' go.... wait...nevermind.... I lost my patience for a second. Anyway, happy birthday.

3:13 AM  

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