Backgammon + Injins + Parrots + Hezbollah = A Terrible Post

Oooooooooh my gawd

This video is so funny on so many levels. I demand that you click upon it.

Their stupidity will be immortalized on the innernets, for generations and generations to see.

So will mine, but it's different. You see, me and my blogger circle get a kick out of self-deprecating humor, but never could it be misconstrued to be representative of our greater associations. Your associates should be ashamed, and not just because of your haircut and poor oratory skills.

Video highlights:

Poor public speaking, or should I say, stammering

Mature behavior

"We are all hezbollah"

Blond/blue peeps talking about the "struggle"

Peoples' ideas of "basic rights"

Freedom of Speech and Freedom of Expression are pretty cool, cuz apparently it means "Freedom for me to say and do whatever the fuck I want if it's politically motivated".. We've posted about this in the past tho, so I'll stop there.

You know how I protested the deforestation, comfort women, eating dolphins, and child exploitation this weekend?

I played backgammon until 5am Sunday morning. Suckahs.



Y'all know I love me some backgammon. My retarded cousin got me into it way back when, and I'm always looking for a new opponent. I've recently let my partner* into the inner-circle, and she wouldn't stop until she beat me, which would explain the 5am thing, but since I'm a master, she had to call it quits.

She beat me first thing Sunday morning tho, so good on her. She's a smarty.

Sunday we finished off the first season of LOST, and went to a BBQ, which was attended by a large group of hipstered out, unambitious Japanese youngsters. The meat was tasty though, the company was good, and after a few beers and an assload of meat we took off to look at shoes and rent a movie.

OK, I know I've harped on this before, but I think I remember someone saying this movie wasn't all that bad, so I rented it.



Hey, thanks for fuckin me Jinxy. As if Syriana didn't put me in the hole enough.



I love the fitted buckskins.

You know what part I found the most offensive was though? What really pissed me off?

The Presence of Tropical Parrots

The quick scene back at the camp with the tropical parrots. You probably don't even remember it, but it almost made me barf up a bunch of meat and beer. Yeah, for about one and a half seconds, they showed a couple Indians playing with two tropical parrots. In Virginia. In the 15th century. You're kidding me right? I guess you're gonna try and convince me that this small band of Indians had trade-routes down to South America? Or maybe you're going to tell me that bright orange and green parrots could survive there without getting taken the fuck out by a slew of birds of prey that would love nothing more than a brightly colored birdie to fly around in the darkened woods. I guess they'd survive the winters too? Get real. I'm so mad right now I can barely type.

I also thought the Indians in the movie acted like retards. I'm sure they were trying to portray them as unspoiled, childlike, and noble, but in the end they just came off looking retarded. Am I saying Indians were/are retarded? No. Am I saying they looked retarded in the movie? Yes. Also, did the Indians back then always wear body paint? Were they able to do nice mono-chromatic fading? Did they have some sort of primitive dirt-airbrush? Shit.

They say "God is in details". I'm tired of being insulted!!!

So to make a long story short, I'm not doing so well on movie credibility with the significant other*. I think that buying LOST was a move in the right direction cuz she liked that a lot, and now makes frequent references to being attacked by "The Others" while walking down the street, which never gets old to me... but I need some movie advice, people. I need a ringer. A sure shot. Help me out here. Something that's out on video in Japan.

So that's my life right now. My biggest worries include renting ethnographically incorrect/insulting movies and losing at backgammon. I'd say life is pretty good. Oh, and I'm going somewhere nice next weekend. Somewhere warm and sunny. Somewhere that starts with H, ends in I, and in the middle sounds something like "awai". I'll keep you updated.

* y'all know I used those words for comedic value. She's my girlfriend.